One Down . . .

to my dear friends,

to set the record straight, i am not a blogger and do not know blogger "protocol." so, it has been a month since my last blog, kinda sounds like when i was a little girl in the confessional booth. please forgive my tardiness for this-it's gonna' be long.

as you all know, on the 16th of march, i had my surgery. my lovely husband gave you the facts surrounding the little details that followed.

the last month has been a time to physically heal as well as emotionally process all that has taken place in what seems to me to be a very short time. in this time, many appointments, blood work, nuclear tests were made. on monday i had an outpatient surgery to put in a "port." a port is a handy dandy way to administer chemo and other blood tests and not use my whimpy veins which seem to bruise/shut down if you look at them in the wrong way.

this past month has also been a time for me to cry out (sometimes weep) to the Lord. it has been a month that i must look at His truths and remind myself that these are the only truths that will empower, encourage, strengthen, and sustain me. as much as i love my docs (they are the best around) and they give me great medical hope, i want to place my trust in Jesus and in him alone. what would i do without Him? He continues to be my "hiding place."

this month has been a wonderful time of seeing the love of family, friends, brothers and sisters in Christ, people i do not know, old and new friends, health care workers- all meeting a need in our life for love, help and compassion in ways i never even imagined. i think this has been something that has overwhelmed me the most. i know there are so many pains and hardships in so many families all around us-but they keep giving, a call, an email, a blog post, a card, a meal, flowers, a visit from the sOnshine cleaning crew, these are too much for me take in but i feel so absolutely blessed and Not alone. thank you. i love you all like you will never know.

it has also been a time to see the beauty, protection, love and tenderness of my husband. as you can imagine, bruce is walking with me so closely. at times, wanting to be strong, he may build a hedge of protection around his sweet, tender heart. being the "toughie" i have always been, i "lovingly" (he he) remind him that this is the time to draw us closer to each other and to our Saviour, no time to build walls. (i hate walls by the way.) how precious to have a strong man who hears my heart and can weep with me and respond. how precious that he has other strong, Godly men to listen, pray, counsel, and love him. i pray that God continues to mold and shape us and uses this in our marriage and in the lives of others in the decades to come.

today was my first session of chemotherapy. i wore red lipstick thanks to cami and (stacey-my new favorite mac make-up girl.) it was lovely. bruce went for my first session, my mom stopped by with an iced mocha swirl latte from dunkin donuts (my once in three week chemo treat), my oldest and dearest friend, my brother mark-even stopped by for his lunch break. i met two new friends, susan and shelly, both breast cancer patients. susan was an alumni, shelly was new. it was like a mini counsel and "tips" session. encouraging and emotional. of course, the nurses, what precious and loving people. . . i am feeling good at the moment, and that is why i wanted to jet out this blog before i begin to feel the "effects" of the day. it helped when i arrived home to be greeted by flowers planted in our bare entryway by my dear friend trudes. (i love you!) nothing brightens a day more than little, colorful reminders of God's beauty.

1Peter 1:3-8
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ!

Lord Jesus, test my faith and may it be found to be genuine and faithful. i know this trial is for "a little while-" help me trust in You and You alone. i love You. terese